Private affairs with friends, family, and relationships have an inevitable effect on everything in your life; including your education. It is a very harsh lesson to learn but your social life doesn’t matter. Are you going to see every single face you see in your school/college/university for the rest of your life? No, you’re not, so don’t let these people tamper with your grades.
Having been somewhat of an unwilling social recluse for the prior few years due to my ME/CFS, being back in an academic environment was so odd and intoxicating with all of these new faces. I made friends easily but sometimes, they weren’t always the best friends to have around. I found that I suffered terrible payback from my illness because of the stresses of downfalls of friendships and relationships and, ultimately, my academic level slipped a bit.
Being a bit of a quick learner, I took myself out of myself to see just how much the social part of my life was consuming and negatively affecting my life. When I realized this in its saddening reality, I stopped choosing friends over my studies and withdrew myself from the potentially impending drama. This benefited me massively.
It’s not a bad thing to be a social recluse. Hide in the library, bury yourself in books, write until your wrists crackle like a cement mixer. In the end, you have to put you first.
― Tammy-Louise Wilkins, 8 Student Tips
When you’re in a school/college/university, you see the same people almost every day. You grow accustomed to seeing them. You begin to socialise with them outside of work and that’s when one person you socialise with becomes two and then three and eventually you’ll find yourself integrated into a pool of heads.
The problem in this is that, when you see the very same people every day and know them personally, you are guaranteed to be drafted into the inevitable drama that circles around the group. As I said above, all of these factors do affect your education. It’s time that you find the balance between these two aspects in life.
It's hilarious, is it not? To be strong-armed into a reclusive life, only to find yourself retreating back into it voluntarily when you’re exposed to the perils of social obligation?
Removing yourself somewhat from the social side of things at your place of study is difficult. Pulling away from the altercations creates a little more quarrel at first. But you will quickly learn that retreating to a quiet area or an area void of people who will engage you in conversation not related to your work is beneficial.
Having had a year of being back in the world of academia under my belt, I came back with the wise knowledge of what is more important; my studies. Unsurprisingly, going from the lecture hall to the library and back again isn’t bad – especially when my academic level rose swiftly back to the glory it was at the beginning of last year.
Becoming a social recluse comes with a lot of struggle to begin with. Trouble will follow you – you can’t please people and you can’t win in the beginning because there’s a lot of confusion as to why you’re withdrawing.
My advice is simple;
- Create a routine.
- Become comfortable in the routine.
- Slowly reintegrate into a social life.
Juggling things is hard. Especially for me as I have my health which hinders me from a great deal. Juggling health, my family life, studying and having a social life is ridiculously hard but, having got my priorities straight, I’m doing pretty damn fine!
I wanted to know what YOU thought and so I conducted a survey. Surprisingly, 75% of students preferred to dedicate themselves to education before social life. I would like to thank everyone who partook in the experiment. The results were very interesting!